Stay-at-home mothers have lives too!

One of my ongoing complaints as a SAHM and Homeschooling mom is that people seem to think that I don’t really have a life, schedule, or plans during the day. So, as their schedule changes, mine is expected to change as well, never mind if that affects my plans. I don’t think they really even consider it.  So, when my kids make a play date with a friend, whose parents are both working, and something changes in their schedule, I am expected to be just as flexible and change right along with it. My husband, who works for our company, is just as bad. Anything that occurs to him, something he can’t do, and it gets farmed out to me.

SAHMs have a job. It’s called raising kids. You know? The job many parents farm out to other people? Some people farm out parenting because they have no choice. They have to earn a living and barely get by. Some parents farm their kids out because they want to maintain a certain lifestyle, and that costs money. Some farm this job out because they can’t fathom spending all day with their kids. Any homeschooling, stay-at-home parent has heard those words : ‘god, I would go crazy spending all day with my kids.’  I am a SAHM (even though I spend several hours a week at my place of business catching up with the accounts) out of choice. And I blessed beyond words to be able to afford to do it. Sure, not working has reduced our income somewhat, and if it hadn’t we could have moved to a fancier home a long time ago, but we love our kids, love our neighborhood, and so it’s working out just splendidly.

But we do have lives.  I like living and working by a schedule. Things just work better that way for me. I am not an organized person by nature, so sudden deviations in my day and week causes me to lose my footing and stumble. And when a friend asks if their kid can come on during the week and I offer , say, Tuesday and Friday, please take that as a hint that I didn’t mention Monday, Wednesday, Thursday or the weekend because I have things going on that time.  The same goes for time of day. I am fairly specific. 

On some days I can be more flexible (especially on non school days), but by and large, I can be just as inflexible with my timing as any parent working out of the home.

My kids are my job. No I don’t sit on the sofa and eat bon-bons. And no, homeschoolers don’t sit somewhere in the home just playing video games all day.  We actually do have a life!

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